Children and Young People and Domestic Abuse

All families disagree sometimes. When they disagree, some families argue in quiet voices and/or some families yell and scream at each other. However, in some families, people hit with their hands and fists or with sticks and other weapons that hurt, including nasty words or threats.

You might live in a family where you have a mum and dad or your parents may be in a same sex relationship.  Your dad or your mum's partner might take you to the cinema, or plays games with you but they also might hurt you with their hands or with angry shouting. They might like to control where you and your mum can go or who you can talk to and sometimes it may feel like keeping it a secret is too much to keep inside.

It's not easy living at home when all of this stuff is going on but unfortunately it happens in a lot of families.

If any of this sounds like your home life, you could be living with Domestic Abuse.



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What is Domestic Abuse?

Domestic abuse is the name for frightening and controlling behaviour that happens within the family. In all families there will be times when people feel cross and argue with each other. However, there is a difference between this behaviour and domestic abuse.

When most grownups have an argument, they can talk it through and eventually become friends again. When someone is being abusive, however, it can feel like the argument never ends and that no matter what you (or Mum) do, they will still be angry and frightening. No-one should be made to feel frightened or stupid by someone else, especially in your own home.

There are several ways of how someone might act when they are being abusive. You might recognise one of these or all of them, and you may be able to think of other examples we haven't. If you're not sure, it's better to ask someone you trust, but the thing they have in common is that they make you feel bad.



Types of Abuse

Emotional Abuse

  • Saying things to frighten you or another person
  • Calling you names which make you feel bad
  • Making you, your friends or family feel unwelcome
  • Stopping you from seeing your friends
  • Slamming doors, throwing things,etc which make you feel frightened

Physical Abuse

  • Hitting, punching,kicking, pinching you
  • Forcing you to watch someone else being physically hurt
  • Making threats to hurt you

Sexual Abuse

  • Touching you in places that you don't like or make you feel uncomfortable
  • Making you touch them or other people in places you don't like or feel uncomfortable
  • Forcing you to take part in sexual activities
  • Forcing you to watch sexual images

Financial Abuse

  • Taking another person's money away
  • Not giving them any money
  • Checking wht they are spending money on
  • Not allowing them to work


REMEMBER , it is NOT your fault! You are NOT responsible for how someone else acts.


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